Time

This is going to be harder than I thought. Time seems to pass much too quickly. I wonder if I will live long enough for Lilly to remember me. The thought of that originally made me sad. I guess I still does, but not as sad. Then I thought that it was okay she didn't remember me. I was doing these things with her, for me, not for her. THEN the epiphany hit me. I am helping to form Lilly in ways we will never know. We all are. Our being in her life, our loving her, our day to day interactions with her, help form the very essence of her. She is a compilation of all of us. The personality she was born with, our interactions, all are important. It makes it easier for me. I know that even if she doesn't remember me, Grandma, she will have a part of me in her.

I picked her up from school the other day. We stopped by the store. After picking up our groceries, we entered the check out line. I used my debit card, something didn't work so the cashier shouts, at what I am sure, is the top of his lungs "insufficient funds". I knew I had funds in that account, several funds as a matter of fact. After trying it another time, I said I would just go to the ATM, which I did. While standing there entering my PIN number, Lilly tried to help push the buttons. Unfortunately, she doesn't know my PIN number, so she wasn't much help. I asked her to not push the buttons...and again not to push the buttons...and again not to push the buttons. Finally I leaned over and said "Lilly, do. not. push. the. buttons." She looked up at me, shook her finger and said "Gwama, don't talk to me like that." hummm, wonder where she heard that!

So what is our lesson from today. Be very careful what you say to Lilly. It is soaking in on many levels!

Love to all,
Nancy